BusyCowboy

Most of us will be taking stock of the credit crunch and gearing up for a looming recession.

But for those still miraculously immune to the financial downturn you could do far worse than invest in this jewel-encrusted bra worth a staggering £3million.

Supermodel Adriana Lima is sporting Victoria’s Secret’s latest bra which is encrusted with nearly 3,900 precious gems, thousands of tiny black diamonds, 117 one-carat round diamonds and 34 rubies.

The lavish item is finished off with a spectacular pair of 100-carat black diamond drops.

The Black Diamond Miracle Bra is also crafted to give maximum cleavage lift.

US lingerie firm Victoria’s Secrets certainly doesn’t do things by half.

Their catwalk show is reportedly the sexiest event in the fashion calendar.

This year’s big-budget extravaganza featured live music from top artists and flamboyant accessories, including angel and bird wings.

But, as reports flood in of worried savers stocking up on gold, the bank-busting bra could perhaps be described as a sound investment.

This way, women can keep their savings in a Victoria’s Secret hiding place.

A family is at the dinner table. The son asks his father, “Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?”

The father, surprised, answers, “Well, son, there’s three kinds of breasts. In her twenties, a woman’s breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her thirties to forties, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit. After fifty, they are like onions.”

“Onions?” asks the boy.

“Yes,” said the father, “you see them and they make you cry.”

This infuriated his wife and daughter so the daughter said, “Mom, how many kinds of willies are there?”

The mother, surprised, smiles and answers, “Well dear, a man goes through three phases. In his twenties, his willie is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his thirties and forties, it is a birch, flexible but still reliable. After his fifties, it is like an old Christmas tree.”

“A Christmas tree?”

“Yes, dead from the roots up and the balls are for decoration only.”

大S说她的片酬低得只能够她买50双鞋

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Only China is has a greater thirst, but they also have an extra billion people’s thirst to quench

Of course the US beer industry is a juggernaught. Ranking around 35th on the global GDP list, our beer sales rival nations.

War is expensive, and so is free beer. Although it’s though unlikely to ever see a politician campaign with a “Make beer, not war” slogan, it is good to know that the economics are there to make it happen.

With moon-landing levels of public support, cooperation and diligence, we could get this lasting testament to the wonders of Beer created, and filled too. OK, still day dreaming here, but if you just wanted to visualize 30 teragrams of liquid, here you go. What’s a teragram? It’s a scientific way of saying “that’s fucking heavy!”

It seems like there’s been a real mainstream rise in creative defacement of advertising. For example…

If there’s been an ad promoting telecommunications and sodomy together that isn’t a complete delight, I haven’t seen it. Telus would be wise to integrate this into their campaigns. Finally anal sex lovers, we have a phone! I mean you. You have a phone. You.

The economy is in meltdown, consumer spending is dwindling and Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke is seriously considering priming the monetary system with change he found inside his sofa. That just means you need a vacation more than ever — and the good news about the bad news is that the financial crisis has made some typically pricey destinations suddenly affordable.

ICELAND

Drop in currency value since a year ago: 51%
No developed country has suffered as much from the credit crunch as Iceland, which has seen its banking system and its currency, the kronur, all but collapse. The silver lining in an Arctic cloud: what was once one of the most expensive, if memorable, destinations in Europe has suddenly gone budget. Decent hotels in the hip capital of Reykjavik — like the Centerhotel Thingholt — are as low as $60 a night. Sure, if you go in the late fall or winter you’ll get only about five hours of sunlight a day.

CANADA

Drop in currency value since a year ago: 21%
If Canadians didn’t want us to make fun of their traditionally weak currency, why did they call it the loonie? A year ago, the joke was on us — a Canadian dollar was actually worth more than its American counterpart. Fortunately, economic catastrophe has reasserted the natural order of U.S.-Canadian relations. From the cosmopolitan charm of Montreal to the amazing skiing of Whistler (and, in between, Saskatchewan), America’s neighbor to the north is a great place to spend strengthening greenbacks.

AUSTRALIA

Drop in currency value since a year ago: 28%
The Aussies’ unoriginally named currency almost managed parity with the American dollar in recent years. Not anymore. The Down Under dollar now gets you only about 66 cents. But that opens the Land of Thunder’s many delights to the American budget traveler — once, of course, you mortgage your devalued home for a plane ticket.

GREAT BRITAIN

Drop in currency value since a year ago: 23%
Admittedly, it’s difficult to put England on any kind of budget-travel list, given that a brief, one-way trip on the 145-year-old London Underground will still run you more than $6. But compared with a year ago, when you needed more than $2 to buy a single coin with the Queen of England’s face on it, Britain has gotten considerably cheaper — relatively. (See 10 things to do in London.)

SOUTH KOREA

Drop in currency value since a year ago: 30%
For South Koreans, the current economic meltdown has a sickening familiarity. During the 1997 Asian financial crisis, the South Korean won lost 52% of its value against the dollar. Things haven’t gotten that bad yet in 2008, but there are still plenty of sudden bargains in the Land of Morning Calm, long an unjustly ignored travel destination. Bewildering Seoul boasts dramatic mountains, spicy street food and gorgeous royal palaces. You can get soju — the potent rice wine that will enable you to forget the recession, along with everything else. (See 10 things to do in Seoul.)